O.K., on with the horror show. It is Christmas morning, and Mark and Roger are sitting around their apartment trying to pretend they're not losers. Collins arrives in a jolly mood, despite the fact that he just got the stuffing beat out of him the night before. He tells them that he's been kicked out of MIT because of his activism. Reading between the lines, I'd guess he was protesting instead of going to class or writing papers. Collins is an anarchist, but not to worry: he's gotten a job as a part time philosophy professor at a local university, where he'll no doubt fit right in. He then introduces Mark and Roger to Angel, who prances in dressed as drag queen Santa. Angel is flashing around a big wad of cash, giving some to Mark and Roger who are obviously excited to get money which they didn't have to work for. Angel describes how he got the money: by killing someone's pet dog. All four of them seem to find this amusing, and we realize that they are sociopaths and genuinely awful people. Angel tells them this in execrable song: "Today 4 U," all the while jumping on their furniture in high heeled boots and pounding on everything in sight with his drumsticks. Mark and Roger don't seem to care that Angel is doing a number on their furnishings... huh, I guess maybe it's true that you don't value things which you don't have to pay for. Incomprehensibly- frankly, unbelievably- the other three appear to enjoy this ghastly performance, smiling and nodding along as Angel "sings" about murdering the dog. By the end of the scene, I was no longer surprised that the dog had jumped off a balcony to escape from this atonal exhibition. Picture a four year old jumping up and down on your couch and table, pounding on things and singing/ yelling a song that he's making up as he goes along. Now picture the four year old as a thirty four year old. How entertaining would you find it? Maureen, Mark's ex calls asking for his help, and off he runs obediently, like the spineless wonder he is, and ends up awkwardly working with Maureen's girlfriend Joanne on the sound system for the upcoming protest. At first hostile, they end up bonding over Maureen's infidelity. Joanne- a lawyer- seems shocked that the woman who cheated on her boyfriend to be with her, has now been unfaithful with someone else. Gee, who could have seen that coming. These people are all too stupid to live. Meanwhile, the scenes with the HIV/AIDS support group Collins and Angel attend contain the best parts of the film- mostly because the main characters aren't the ones talking. At the Christmas meeting, however, Mark interrupts, barging in noisily and then pulling out his camera; it occurs to him belatedly to ask if he can film the meeting for his "documentary". No one actually says no, though some of the members look extremely uncomfortable at the thought of having their expressions of pain and fear recorded. Mark doesn't notice, or more likely, doesn't care- if we've learned anything by this point, it's that all Mark cares about is himself and what he wants. Next we're treated to the sight of Mimi at the Cat Scratch Club, where she works as an exotic dancer. While this is hardly an ideal job, she at least- unlike most of the other characters in this movie- is gainfully employed. Afterwards, she climbs in through Mark and Roger's window and, finding Roger alone, attempts to get him to do drugs and sleep with her. He refuses, but she persists, singing "No Day But Today" the gist of which is that they must live for today, let go, and follow their feelings. Though tempted, Roger eventually throws her out- the one smart move he makes in the entire film. But-get this- the movie doesn't portray it this way; the scene is filmed to make Roger seem uptight and harsh, while making Mimi seem in the right and hurt by his unjust rejection. How dare newly drug-free Roger not want to jump into bed with the drug addled stripper who crawled in his window? Why can't he just be spontaneous and go with the flow? Frankly, it's generally a bad idea to take life management advice from an addict who is swinging around a stripper pole. But, as I swiftly realized while watching Rent, in this film up is down, right is wrong, and villains are heroes.
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